It doesn't sound like this is about you - but about your 'friends' issues. Focus on you and your strenglths...if you feel good about yourself, it will show. There will always be audience members out there who say those things. It's more hurtful when you *know* thye are saying those things...but there is nothing you can do about it (and I'm not writin ganything you don't already know). I know that sounds lame and something your mom would tell you in jr. high...but I really honestly think it's "not you". It's definately their issue.

Maybe some activities that might help:
Write your fears in a journal or on a paper - then burn it (in a safe place)
Pick both a non-bellydancing friend and a bellydancing friend and do a private show for them. ADepending upon how you feel - ask them to be either critical or supportive (either type of feedback should come from a place of love and friendship). Maybe someone you've never danced in front of before.
Imagine what things your 'friends' might say about *you* -- and how you would feel about it...are they true or just mean?
What do you think is the goal of these 'friends' comments? Is it to make themselves feel better by putting others down or do they feel better than others or do they not have enough gossip in their life...and then ask - how important to me are these comments based on the source and intent.

Remember - it's not about you.

I agree with Stef. Just surround yourself with positive people who appreciate you. Their warmth and genuine support will make the interaction with ugly people less hurtful.

Taaj
www.taaj.org

Releve softly and balance a big sword!

I'd also like to put in here that sometimes people say things like this just to get a laugh, to have fun and be funny. Sometimes, it's not meant as being truly hateful. People tend to have a TV mentality when it comes to live performances: they feel completely separate from those onstage and therefore don't think of them as real people. I know this doesn't make it easier to take, but just remember, you don't have to listen to them. Don't let them get to you.

You can take my husband with you?? AHAHA

He will fight to the end to make sure that people dont treat my troupemates and I like strippers, "exotic" dancers and if they come too close, out they go.

Its sweet really =)
untill he tries to kill one of the troupemates husbands... ahahahahah (that was funny)

I really don't like dancing for belly dancers. Actually I don't think I have ever done it. I feel like I would be put under microscope and every movement would be analyzed and criticized. May be it's not true but thank God I don't have this situation because I don't dance for free, and normally all this haflas / belly dance sponsored events are for free. I dance regularly (paid gigs) so I dn't feel the need to do it for a bunch of dancers.
I often see belly dancers in the audience - in that case I don't feel paranoid - after all I am performing, getting paid and they're there to enjoy it.

If you are successful, or have something others want, some people will be jjelous, and will try to bring you down. It's best not to pay attention to that. Just be confident in your abilities, and keep your head up. Or you can try to avoid those kind of situations altogether.