I'm debating whether I should say anything about this to the dancer or keep my mouth shut. My instincts are to shut up, but if I were the dancer I would want to know.
I watched an acquaintance perform very recently. She's an experienced dancer and a lady in her forties (grown daughter, you wouldn't think so otherwise.) She is very much a lady, always polite and elegant. We've been acquainted several years, but are not close friends.
She wore a beautiful backless dress, and the back dipped very low. I'm not sure if we were seeing anatomy or a shadow where the dress met her posterior, but it was very distracting. I know I was not the only person to have this reaction, as several people around me looked away whenever she turned her back to the audience.
I hate the idea of embarrassing her, but she should know to fix the dress before she wears it again. Opinions? Points of view?
I watched an acquaintance perform very recently. She's an experienced dancer and a lady in her forties (grown daughter, you wouldn't think so otherwise.) She is very much a lady, always polite and elegant. We've been acquainted several years, but are not close friends.
She wore a beautiful backless dress, and the back dipped very low. I'm not sure if we were seeing anatomy or a shadow where the dress met her posterior, but it was very distracting. I know I was not the only person to have this reaction, as several people around me looked away whenever she turned her back to the audience.
I hate the idea of embarrassing her, but she should know to fix the dress before she wears it again. Opinions? Points of view?
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Minneapolis
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Re: should I say anything?
Mon, April 7, 2008 - 8:09 PM*Cringe*
Tell her.
I would want someone to tell me. My dance partner and I straighten each other out all the time... thank goodness for her. It's good to have someone who's willing to be honest. I mean, what if she plans to do that dance again, in the same dress? Tell her... respectfully. Compliment the dance and acknowledge her hard work, but tell her (in private, not in front of others) she had a bit of a costume malfunction going on... that is easy to correct.
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Re: should I say anything?
Mon, April 7, 2008 - 9:25 PMYes, absolutely tell her...in total private!! I know it's hard, but it's the right thing to do.
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 6:56 AMTell her.
You said it yourself, if it was you, you'd want someone to tell you! Just make sure you do it in private and approach it gently by telling her how wonderful her dance was and then sort of gently tell her that there was something you noticed that you thought she might want to know!
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 7:04 AMIf you know her, you should tell her. I had a very similar problem but it was with a dancer I didn't know and it was during a show. She was wearing a bra that was much to big. Think a 36 D on someone who should wear a 32-34 B. Needless to say, I saw everything that nature gave her. Unfortunately, I couldn't find her anywhere during the break. I don't know if anyone told her or not, but if it was me, I'd like to know. It might be embarassing to know that I was showing something I shouldn't have, but it would be more embarassing to do it over and over again.
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 7:29 AMPlease tell her. We all want to leave a positive impression with the audience. Sometimes we just need a little guidance.
Actual occurance: Dancer glided on stage, turning her back to the audience, and half her hinny was exposed. Audible gasp and what do we do from performers waiting in the wings. Grabbed abba, walked out on stage, covered her allowing for quick fix and on with the show.
I would want to be told. -
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 1:49 PMYou could even phrase it like "hey, I'm not sure if it was a shadow or what, but it looked kinda like..." -
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 3:15 PMTotally. Really good way to put it without sounding like a creepy trouble maker :) -
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 5:36 PMThanks for your good advice, everyone. I emailed the dancer, since it might be weeks until I run into her again and I don't have her phone number. I tried to be tactful and she answered with thanks for telling her.
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Re: should I say anything?
Tue, April 8, 2008 - 10:37 PMAs my male friend says "girl-crack good, boy-crack bad" - but really tell her!
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Re: should I say anything?
Wed, April 9, 2008 - 7:59 AMDefinitely tell her. This could happen to anyone. You can't really see how costumes shift when you are wearing them- especially in the back, so she probably has no idea. I think the kind thing to do is always tell someone so that they aren't continuously embarassed. She will thank you for it.
Taaj
www.taaj.org
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Re: should I say anything?
Sat, April 12, 2008 - 1:44 PMSAY NO TO CRACK..................lol. I also hate when peoples bras gap. If you looked down thier bra at just the right angle, you'll see full boobage! I have had my share of mistakes and when I looked back at my videos, I would be so upset that no one took it upon themselves to tell me and help me out. This is why I bring a huge box of different sized safety pins, everywhere I go, so no other dancer has to suffer a malfunction.....including myself. God bless safety pins!
